Tag Archive: hate

The Monster in my Home




somewhere to run to
I’ve lost
Why can’t I hold
myself back
I never learn
this is how I get hurt
setting up for failure
reveal yourself
but you’ll end up alone
like always
I need my secrets
but I’m too honest
I always show them where
it hurts most
where to throw their stones
trusting little lamb


You little pest
Hold your breath
please be my guest
I’m sick of your tests
I just want to be at rest
I’ll continue my quest
At your jests
I’m unimpressed
without you I’m blessed
my passion awakes in my breast
Of your charm I’m dispossessed
rip up my princess dress
Fly free from your nest
Of ghoulish depressed
deprived of their best
I am self-possessed
No longer obsessed


Shiny Illusions Of Hope

Do you want me to kill myself?
My head in the toilet,
Another desolate broken songbird.
All this time
That’s what you’ve been wanting.
So tragic and romantic!
You can be sad,
Finally have a reason to love me!
Say you miss me,
But I’ve run far away,
Chasing freedom,
Her white gown eluding my grasp
Fades into the mist.
You want to destroy me!!
Come back, come back!
We’re not done with you!
Your trying to live,
We want you dead.
Here’s some pills.
You feel that pain?
Kill it with them.
You can do nothing,
Nothing ever good.
Tempt me with promises,
Promises of care.
Bent and twisted lies,
Shiny illusions of hope.
Watch my tender heart
Turn cold.
Drown myself in darkness.
Can I never escape?


Women Trained Like Slaves

We’ve been trained like slaves
to judge, rip apart.
I’m reading,
He said, did you enjoy it?
I said, I’m still searching.
WOW, you like those
bikini clad girls.
Sorry… no I’m not.
games, games,
should I repeat?
He said, you think your the only one?
I said, you want me to compete…
with her, with them?
Oh, dont bother me anymore,
I’m about to explode.
I need to find myself,
your tearing me apart.




I’m one of the
broken fragile people with only glue holding together their beaten souls
fragile yet strong
strong on my own
no one else ever there for me
I’m strong because I’ve had no one
no love, no shelter
a broken family
and you think I’m spoiled
I’m too clever
too pretty
that I must have had it all
but I’ve never had a thing
a kind word, praise, comfort
from anyone
I’m on my own
my strength is my own
torn and broken
as my pride is
how dare you rip apart my faith
justification in loving one and punishing another
you don’t know me
the words the judgements
I hear
I will not let hurt me anymore
a kind word is the world to those who’ve never had any
but you’ll never understand me
I love all, you included
I never want to inflict the suffering I’ve lived through on another

let the cycle end here

with me



Hope is a little bird that lives in a dark little cave in your heart,

holding it together with its sad little song.

Until one day for no reason at all it flies away.

Leaving your heart to cave in, crack, crumble

and turn into a dust from which the phoenix will never rise.


The Hole in Me

all i ever wanted to do was stab a knife in your neck.
Leave a hole in you like you left in me.
i hate you.
i want him.
i want the love i never had.
but i despise it.
i can never be satisfied
that hole will always be there.
as i stand here dripping wet,
i realize now even his most sincere love will never be enough
i want to devour him, destroy him, like you did me.
no i love him, i want to protect him, from you,
from my projections.
he’s innocent or guilty?
i dont want him, i need him
to annihilate me through our desire,
only through this death can i be free.
Pluto, you bastard, this is not fun.


My Dream Last Night

I dreamed last night of stealing clothes from a rich womans garage sale.

She was in her big home looking at freshly bought clothes.

 She didn’t even notice us putting the clothes in our car.

I guess she had so much she didn’t notice.

It was justice.

She didn’t even notice they were gone.

We where scared of the police, but they never came.

It was only our fear that terrorized us.

In my another dream that night,

I tried to steal some rare Music Dvd’s.

An eBay seller had them.

 His inflated prices where unjust.

He was raping some fan of their money.

These dreams symbolizes my feelings towards Americans.

I see people with “toys” that cost thousands of dollars.

Money used for selfish pleasure instead of helping feed, clothe and educate their fellow-man.

A million justifications and delusions approve this.

Like “I donate to charities” and “they need to get a job”

The solution to poverty and starvation is not simple.

There is a limited amount of money in the country,

money does not grow on trees,

The federal bank cannot print enough money to make everyone a millionaire.

The economy would collapse.

People need to get together and ensure no human being in our country is starving, uneducated, abused or unwanted.

There are not easy solutions.

Self sacrifice and a radically different way of thinking about each other is what we need.

We need to LOVE one another as brothers and sisters.

That is the only way out of this vicous cycle of selfishness and hate.